Relationship Insults

Bacon is bacon, eggs are eggs, don't let guys between your legs, they say you're cute, they say you're fine, nine months later they say not mine.

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Garbage is dumped, And so are you.

I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the garbage.

What's the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One has a moustache and smells of fish and the other is a walrus.

You're like the first slice of bread in the bag. Everyone touches you, but nobody really wants you.

You're not my cup of tea, mainly because I don't like huge pieces of shit in my tea.

You're so ugly, the only dates you get are on a calendar.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I feel bad for the guys, That end up with you.

Bitch please. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.

Bitch, I don't want your boyfriend. Nobody wants your boyfriend; that's why he's with you!

"When I think about you, I touch myself." Meaning I rub my temples, because you give me a fucking headache.

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

Don't feel too special, I'm only keeping your number in my phone so I know not to answer when you call.

Your girlfriend is so ugly she went to a dog show. And won.

Ex: You'll never find someone like me. You: That's the point.

If you're sad about being alone on Valentine's Day, just remember.. Nobody loves you on the other days of the year either.

You want my ass? You had my ass. You let my ass walk away. The only ass left is your dumbass!

I heard you were dating my ex -- how do I taste?

You're so fat, when you're single it's more like single and ready for a Pringle.