Fat Insults

Ready for some funny overweight banter? Comeback with these humorous insults for fat people.

  • You're so fat, when you went to space, there was no space left.
    378
  • I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
    440
  • You're so fat, when you sit around the house, you sit AROUND the HOUSE.
    -475
  • Hey, you have something on your chin.... No, the 3rd one down.
    313
  • You're so fat, when you're single it's more like single and ready for a Pringle.
    100
  • Behind every fat person there's someone beautiful. No seriously, you're in the way.
    285
  • Some people carry ketchup with them, some people carry maple syrup with them. But you, you carry the whole fucking McDonald's!
    213
  • You wanna know how I know you're an autobot? You have to "roll out" of everywhere you go.
    55
  • Person: Does this dress make me look fat?
    You: No, your fat makes you look fat.
    137
  • Hey I forgot to tell you: the bakery called, they said they want their rolls back.
    204
  • You're so fat, when you get into row boat it becomes a submarine.
    167
  • When was the last time you saw your whole body in the mirror?
    239
  • I've been told that inside every fat person, there's someone beautiful... I'm just wondering who the hell you ate!?
    226
  • You're so fat that the only thing stopping you from going to weight watchers is the door.
    189
  • You're so fat that when you play basketball the ball bounces you instead.
    -235
  • If your IQ was as high as your weight, you'd be a genius.
    301
  • Fat Albert called, he wants his belly back.
    -103
  • Every time he goes on a diet, the farmers revolt.
    -135
  • Hey! If we killed you, we would stop world hunger!
    255
  • I'm sorry but when was the last time you saw your belly button?
    70