Best Insults and Comebacks

The highest-rated insults and comebacks on the website.

  • 1
    Insult: You're a fail.
    Comeback: So was your dad's condom.
    5.4K
  • 2
    I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
    3.9K
  • 3
    Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.
    3.7K
  • 4
    You're just mad 'cause your mom has a bigger dick than you.
    3.1K
  • 5
    You should wear a condom on your head because if you're gonna act like a dick you might as well dress like one!
    2.9K
  • 6
    You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen.
    2.6K
  • 7
    I'd slap you, but that would be animal abuse.
    2.4K
  • 8
    Have you been shopping lately? They are selling lives at the mall - you should get one.
    2.3K
  • 9
    Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
    2.3K
  • 10
    Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.
    1.8K
  • 11
    Shock me, say something intelligent.
    1.8K
  • 12
    Twinkle twinkle little star,
    I want to hit you with my car,
    Throw you off a cliff so high,
    I hope you break your neck and die.
    1.8K
  • 13
    My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
    1.7K
  • 14
    I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
    1.7K
  • 15
    Insult: You Failed! Comeback: Yeah, so did your mom's abortion. :)
    1.6K
  • 16
    Insult: YOU SUCK! Comeback: AND YOU SWALLOW!
    1.6K
  • 17
    I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
    1.6K
  • 18
    At least when I do a handstand my stomach doesn't hit me in the face.
    1.4K
  • 19
    Roses are red, shit is brown, shut the fuck up, and sit the fuck down.
    1.4K
  • 20
    Man, I bet you were up all night, working on that one.
    1.4K