Old People Insults

One more wrinkle and you'd pass for a prune.

Yo momma's so old, she was the stripper at Jesus's bachelor party.

You're so old, you waited tables at the last supper.

You've got more wrinkles than an Elephant's scrotum.

You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you.

You're so old, you've seen honey expire!

You're so old, you left your purse on Noah's ark.

The best contraceptive for old people is nudity.

You're so old you're birthday cake looks like a forest fire.

You're so old, the candles weigh more than the birthday cake.

You're so old, the Three Wise Men helped you with your homework.

Your so old your farts turn to dust.

You're so old, I bet you're constipated!

Your grandfather is so old, when he went to school, history was current events.

Your grandfather is so old he remembers when the dead sea was just feeling ill.

I would ask you how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.

Hey, act your age -- senile!