Good Insults

There are 154 good insults and comebacks.

  • I don't see any penises in the general vicinity... So I'm wondering why you keep opening your fucking mouth.
    892
  • Person: You are what you eat.
    Comeback: Perhaps that's why you're such a dick.
    413
  • Bully: You're stupid!
    Comeback: So was you Dad when he thought he didn't need a condom.
    585
  • I'd give a fuck, but I already gave it to your mother last night.
    460
  • I would love to insult you, but I'm afraid I won't do as well as nature did.
    734
  • I may love to shop but I'm not buying your bullshit.
    321
  • I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
    402
  • Girls who claim that a lot of guys are after them should keep in mind that low prices always attract many customers.
    277
  • Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither.
    382
  • If I gave a shit, it would be on your face.
    126
  • Roses are red, monsters are green, look in the mirror, you'll see what I mean.
    757
  • So a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
    82
  • You're like a cloud; once you fuck off, it's a beautiful day.
    316
  • You've got more dick in your personality than you have in your pants.
    451
  • I heard that you were a lady-killer. They take one look at you and die of shock.
    33
  • I'd call you an idiot but that would be an insult to stupid people.
    26
  • Did you just call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement.
    359
  • Bitch please. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.
    302
  • You're the dick you'll never have.
    216
  • I may be drunk, but you are ugly, and tomorrow I will be sober.
    -93