Funny Insults

You: What is the difference between you and an apple? Them: I don't know You: The apple keeps the doctor away, but you keep everything away!

Yo momma's like the Eiffel Tower; she's so big that all of France has seen her and half of Europe has been up her!

Wow, you're so slow, is your ping at 999?

Your mom is like cotton: round, white, and gets picked up by black people.

Your house is so nasty, I tripped over a rat, and a cockroach stole my wallet.

You know that thing above your neck? Yeah, you might want to trade it for a face.

I have a head pain from your mom screaming last night.

Yo momma's so dumb, her favorite color is clear.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.

You remind me of a builders bottom, full of bare faced cheek.

The best part of you ran down your fathers left leg.

He's got a Dick like a turkey poking his head through a bush.

Guy 1: Why are you so fat? Guy 2: Everytime I make love to your wife, she gives me a pizza.

If I wanted my comeback I would have licked it of your Mum's tits last night.

Yo momma's so fat, the NSA had to build a 2 billion dollar complex to store her weight information.

You're such an anal orifice.

I may be drunk, but you are ugly, and tomorrow I will be sober.

The best contraceptive for old people is nudity.

Disability jokes aren't funny. I have a friend in a wheelchair who can't stand them.

A gingers favourite picture... Black and white