Evil Insults

I wish our marriage certificate came with an expiry date.

I'd slap you, but shit stains.

You're the left-overs from the abortion bucket.

Your Mom was a hot 15 year old when she gave birth to you.

What does a shoe have that a ginger doesn't? A sole.

I don't exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I'd drink it.

Do you have to leave so soon? I was just about to poison the tea.

Your parents only had you cause your mother couldn't afford the abortion.

How many times do I have to flush to get rid of you?

You were so ugly as a child, your mother breast fed you through a straw.

You're so poor, when you asked your Mom what's for dinner she opened her legs and said crabs.

The last time I saw a face like yours I fed it a banana.

I bet the only place you're ever invited is outside.

You're so ugly that when you entered the Ms Ugly competition they said "Sorry, no professionals allowed."

You're so ugly, that's why God created paper bags!

Lets play house.You be the door and I'll slam you.

FOR THE LAST TIME! Your mother left here at 9 this morning... Leave me alone!

Mirrors don't talk. Lucky for you they don't laugh either.

I had a nightmare. I dreamt I was you.

Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty, but what the hell happened to you!?