Comeback Insults

Person: I'm straight. You: Straight as a circle!

If you talked anymore shit, you'd be shaped like a turd.

I'd call you a retard, but that would be insulting to retards.

I would say that you are barking up the wrong tree, but that is your natural voice.

You cut me down I must confess but in your mouth my Dick will rest

I might be scared of your face, but not you.

If I were a bird, you'd be the first person I'd shit on.

Don't let my fist hit you on the way down.

Excuse me, I can't hear you over the sound of how wrong you are.

Nobody would miss you if your dad had put you in a tissue.

Insult: You're ugly! Comeback: Sorry, I stole your face.

Woah, who pissed in your fruitloops this morning?

If I had a dollar for everyone I'd met as beautiful as you, I'd be as poor as dirt.

You're like a showbag; full of shit.

You: Why won't you make a clone of yourself. Person: Why? You: So you can go fuck yourself!

When you open your mouth, the flies on the other side of the world notice.

You remind me of a zip loc bag; good for one quality use.

I'd call you an idiot but that would be an insult to stupid people.

Insult: I see you have been shopping for new clothes, where from, Poundland? Comeback: From your wardrobe? (;

Did you leave the stove on? Cause you just got burned.