Idiot Insults

If you spoke your mind, you'd be speechless.

It isn't that I'm not a people person, I'm just not a stupid people person.

I'm sorry, but I couldn't think of a non-insulting way to describe you.

A douche bag of your magnitude could cleanse a whale's vagina.

You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.

I'm not saying you're stupid, I'm just saying you've got bad luck when it comes to thinking.

I'd call you a retard, but that would be insulting to retards.

I'd like to leave you with one thought, but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it!

Of course I talk like an idiot, how else could you understand me?

And what are YOU? The mascot for this country's mental retardation department?

You're as useless as the "g" in lasagna.

If you think you're a wit, you're half right.

I really wish we were better strangers.

Somewhere out there is a tree, tirelessly producing oxygen so you can breathe. I think you owe it an apology.

You are the result of 4 billion years of evolutionary success. Fucking act like it.

I want to call you stupid, but that isn't enough.

Yo momma's so stupid, she tried to sit in the corner of a round room.

Yo momma's so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.

Don't let your mind wander; it's too little to be let out alone.

Bitch, please. You're as useless as the "ay" in "okay".