Good Insults

Guy 1: Why are you so fat? Guy 2: Everytime I make love to your wife, she gives me a pizza.

Just because you have one doesn't mean you have to act like one.

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

I wish our marriage certificate came with an expiry date.

You're so old, the candles weigh more than the birthday cake.

Arguing on the internet is like running in the special olympics; even if you win you are still retarded.

Yo momma's so dumb, her favorite color is clear.

There are 2 things I don't that like about you; your face! So shut BOTH of them!

I'd hit you but on earth we don't hit little girls.

What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? Bricks can get laid.

I wasn't born with enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.

Glad you think I give a fuck but sorry, no such luck.

You're one load your mum should have swallowed!

You hear that? That's the sound of your balls not dropping.

The only vagina that you're going to ever see is the one that you fell out of when you were born.

If I'm ugly, we must be twins.

If I wanted an ass's opinion I would have asked my donkey.

If you've got a problem take it up with my ass, because that's the only one that gives a crap!

Yo momma so ugly she made a blind kid cry.