Funny Insults

You're so bald, that when you wear a poncho, you look like a broken condom.

If you've got a problem take it up with my ass, because that's the only one that gives a crap!

Your family tree must be a cactus because you're all pricks.

I couldn't help but notice that "awesome" ends with "me", and "ugly" begins with "u".

Behind every fat person there's someone beautiful. No seriously, you're in the way.

You hear that? That's the sound of your balls not dropping.

You're so bald, I rub your head to see into the future.

Girls who claim that a lot of guys are after them should keep in mind that low prices always attract many customers.

You're so fat, I took a picture of you last Christmas and it's still printing.

You're so ugly, when you walk through a haunted house, you come out with a paycheck.

Yo momma's so stupid, she took a ruler with her to bed to see how long she slept.

Go put some sand in your crotch, it will make the crabs feel at home.

If you were any more of a dick, gay guys would be trying to suck your forehead.

I've been told that inside every fat person, there's someone beautiful... I'm just wondering who the hell you ate!?

The smartest thing that ever came out of your mouth was a penis.

You're so skinny that you use Chapstick as deodorant.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from you.

You're one load your mum should have swallowed!

Hey I forgot to tell you: the bakery called, they said they want their rolls back.

KFC banned you for having a bigger bucket than them.