Death Insults

When you die, I'd like to go to your funeral, but I'll probably have to go to work that day. I believe in business before pleasure.

Nothing happens after you die? False. Some of us will be throwing a party.

Person: My Parents are dead... Me: Yeah, I'd kill myself too if I had a kid like you.

You'd make a lovely corpse!

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.