Best Ugly Insults

Know someone who isn't the prettiest and could do with some banter? Try our insults and comebacks for ugly people.

  • 21
    I couldn't help but notice that "awesome" ends with "me", and "ugly" begins with "u".
    235
  • 22
    Can I take your picture? I love to collect photos of natural disasters.
    232
  • 23
    Do you know what sexual position produces the ugliest children? Go ask your mother.
    231
  • 24
    If horse-shit was piled up to your height, I'd have trouble telling you apart.
    218
  • 25
    If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world!
    201
  • 26
    You're so ugly when you went to the haunted house they offered you a job.
    190
  • 27
    You're so ugly, if you stuck your head out the window, they'd arrest you for mooning!
    186
  • 28
    You were so ugly as a child, your mother breast fed you through a straw.
    181
  • 29
    Don't look out of the window, people will think that it's Halloween.
    177
  • 30
    Your hairstyle is so ugly, my cat has coughed up better looking ones.
    175
  • 31
    Person: What are you looking at?
    You: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, IT TALKS!!!
    174
  • 32
    Does your face hurt? It's killing me!
    166
  • 33
    You're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mother!
    165
  • 34
    You got more chins than a chinese phone book.
    155
  • 35
    Your face could turn Medusa to stone.
    154
  • 36
    You're so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection ducked.
    138
  • 37
    You've a face like a million dollars - all green and wrinkled.
    136
  • 38
    You're so ugly, when you walk through a haunted house, you come out with a paycheck.
    136
  • 39
    Every girl has the right to be ugly, but you abused the privilege.
    131
  • 40
    Your so ugly, your mother had to tie a steak around your neck to get the dog to play with you
    130