Best Good Comebacks

I don't know which face to talk to, since you have two.

Insult: Kiss my ass. Girl: Which one? Because either way I'd get a mouthful of shit!

Your comebacks are the same just like the size of your dick; small and pedantic.

I haven't taken a shower. Tomorrow I'll be beautiful. You, however, are stupid and will be stupid tomorrow.

Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?

Believe me, I don't want to make a monkey out of you. Why should I take all the credit?

Insult: You suck. Comeback: And your Mom swallows, by the way I wish you were the load that she had swallowed.

Me: Why do you have no dick. You: I do. Me: The one on your mom doesn't count.

You're lying like a rug; dirty and on your back.

I would say that you are barking up the wrong tree, but that is your natural voice.

Please cancel my subscription. I've had enough of your issues.

I'll try and hide my enthusiasm. How am I doing?

Butt and ugly decided to have a kid. Guess what? You're the result.

Off is the general direction in which I wish you would fuck.

Nice come back, now wipe that off your chin.

If someone shoved my head up your ass, I'd live off of the air in your head.

If you talked anymore shit, you'd be shaped like a turd.

I can't listen to you right now. I still have a headache from your mom screaming last night.

I admire you because I've never had the courage it takes to be a liar, a thief, and a cheat.

Insult: You smell. Comeback: Like your Mom's pussy!