Best Good Comebacks

In need of a witty comeback? Check out these good comebacks and you'll be ready for any insult that may come your way!

1

Insult: You're a fail.
Comeback: So was your dad's condom.

5.5K
2

I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

4K
3

Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.

3.8K
4

You're just mad 'cause your mom has a bigger dick than you.

3.2K
5

You should wear a condom on your head because if you're gonna act like a dick you might as well dress like one!

3K
6

I'd slap you, but that would be animal abuse.

2.4K
7

Have you been shopping lately? They are selling lives at the mall - you should get one.

2.4K
8

Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.

2.3K
9

Shock me, say something intelligent.

1.9K
10

Roses are red, shit is brown, shut the fuck up, and sit the fuck down.

1.7K
11

I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!

1.7K
12

Insult: You Failed! Comeback: Yeah, so did your mom's abortion. :)

1.6K

13

Insult: YOU SUCK! Comeback: AND YOU SWALLOW!

1.6K
14

I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

1.6K
15

Man, I bet you were up all night, working on that one.

1.4K
16

I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can lose weight.

1.2K
17

Twinkle twinkle little whore, close your legs, they're not a door.

1.2K
18

Insult: FAIL!
Comeback: Nobody asked for your life story.

1.2K
19

If your gonna be two faced, honey at least make one of them pretty.

1.1K
20

I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and SHIT a better argument than that.

1.1K