Best Good Comebacks

In need of a witty comeback? Check out these good comebacks and you'll be ready for any insult that may come your way!

  • 1
    Insult: You're a fail.
    Comeback: So was your dad's condom.
    5.4K
  • 2
    I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
    3.9K
  • 3
    Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.
    3.7K
  • 4
    You're just mad 'cause your mom has a bigger dick than you.
    3.1K
  • 5
    You should wear a condom on your head because if you're gonna act like a dick you might as well dress like one!
    2.9K
  • 6
    I'd slap you, but that would be animal abuse.
    2.4K
  • 7
    Have you been shopping lately? They are selling lives at the mall - you should get one.
    2.3K
  • 8
    Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
    2.3K
  • 9
    Shock me, say something intelligent.
    1.8K
  • 10
    I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
    1.7K
  • 11
    Insult: You Failed! Comeback: Yeah, so did your mom's abortion. :)
    1.6K
  • 12
    Insult: YOU SUCK! Comeback: AND YOU SWALLOW!
    1.6K
  • 13
    I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
    1.6K
  • 14
    Roses are red, shit is brown, shut the fuck up, and sit the fuck down.
    1.4K
  • 15
    Man, I bet you were up all night, working on that one.
    1.4K
  • 16
    I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can lose weight.
    1.2K
  • 17
    Insult: FAIL!
    Comeback: Nobody asked for your life story.
    1.2K
  • 18
    I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and SHIT a better argument than that.
    1.1K
  • 19
    If your gonna be two faced, honey at least make one of them pretty.
    1.1K
  • 20
    If I wanted a bitch, I would have bought a DOG!!
    1K