Best Insults and Comebacks

Yo momma's so fat, I'd need two Pokeflutes to wake her ass.

You are master in your own house -- the doghouse!

There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure.

Is that your head, or did your neck blow a bubble?

For two cents, I'd give you a piece of my mind -- and all of yours.

Yo momma like a golf course: Everyone gets a hole in one!

Yo momma's so stupid she got locked in the bathroom and still peed her pants.

Yo Momma so fat her tanning bed was Mexico!

Insult: I see you have been shopping for new clothes, where from, Poundland? Comeback: From your wardrobe? (;

Yo mamas so ugly she walked in to Taco Bell and everybody ran to the border.

Yo momma like a vacuum cleaner: A real good suck.

Yo momma's so fat and heavy, she sat on a dollar bill and made George Washington's nose bleed.

You're so old, you waited tables at the last supper.

Let me know when you are coming back to get your balls out of my purse..

If you took an IQ test, the results would be negative

I'll hit you so hard your kids will be born dizzy!

You look like a visible fart.

You're not optimized for life are you?

Why don't you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance?

I would like the pleasure of your company, but it only gives me displeasure.