Best Insults and Comebacks

Yo mamma's so fat, when she wore a yellow shirt in public people yelled "Taxi!"

If I gave a shit, it would be on your face.

Yo Momma is so fat that her cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard.

You're so stupid you tried to steal a free sample.

Yo momma's so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

You mother is so old she went to an antiques auction and people bid on her.

I hear you were born on April 2; a day too late!

Light travels faster than sound, this is why some people appear bright before they speak.

Yo momma smells so horrible, North Korea want her as a chemical weapon.

Deja Poo: The feeling that you've heard this crap before.

You're so stupid, even a two button mouse gives you too many options.

I'd hit you but on earth we don't hit little girls.

You're as fake as a three dollar bill!

Oh my God, look at you. Anyone else hurt in the accident?!

You want my ass? You had my ass. You let my ass walk away. The only ass left is your dumbass!

Excuse me, but you have a little bit of face on your make-up there.

I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!

Your lucky to be born beautiful, unlike me, who was born to be a big liar.

You are as a candle, the better burnt out.

Your so fat, that you have to use a mattress as a maxi-pad.