Best Insults and Comebacks

The highest-rated insults and comebacks on the website.

  • Good Comebacks
    41
    I guess those penis enlargement pills are working - you're twice the dick you were yesterday!
    1.1K
  • Good Comebacks
    42
    I think I have Alzheimer's because I can't remember when I asked for your opinion.
    1.1K
  • Mean Insults
    43
    I failed a spelling test because they asked me how to spell 'bitch' and I wrote down your name.
    1.1K
  • Ugly Insults
    44
    By the way, the zoo called, the baboons want their butts back, so you'll have to find a new face.
    1.1K
  • Good Comebacks
    45
    If I wanted a bitch, I would have bought a DOG!!
    1.1K
  • Good Comebacks
    46
    Insult: You're a pussy.
    Comeback: Well, you are what you eat. Guess that makes you a dick.
    1K
  • Rude Insults
    47
    Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
    1K
  • Relationship Insults
    48
    I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse!
    979
  • Good Comebacks
    49
    Wipe your mouth, there's still a tiny bit of bullshit around your lips.
    977
  • Good Comebacks
    50
    Insult: Why are you so fat?
    Comeback: Because every time I fuck your mom she gives me a cookie.
    951
  • Ugly Insults
    51
    Roses are red, violets are blue, faces like yours belong in a zoo, don't worry I will be there too, not in a cage but laughing at you!
    939
  • Good Comebacks
    52
    By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you blocked and deleted. You may now kiss my ass.
    929
  • Good Comebacks
    53
    Insult: You're jealous!
    Comeback: Yes, I'm jealous of people who don't know you.
    920
  • Girl Insults
    54
    Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as your back?
    913
  • Mean Insults
    55
    God made mountains, God made trees, God made you but we all make mistakes.
    911
  • Fat Insults
    56
    You're so fat you get clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
    911
  • Mean Insults
    57
    God made coke, God made pepsi, God made me, oh so sexy, God made rivers, God made lakes, God made you,... well we all make mistakes.
    905
  • Good Comebacks
    58
    If I would like to hear from an asshole, I'd fart!
    900
  • Good Comebacks
    59
    I don't see any penises in the general vicinity... So I'm wondering why you keep opening your fucking mouth.
    895
  • Good Comebacks
    60
    You know what's funny? Not you, so shut up.
    884