Best Casual Insults

There are 75 casual insults.

  • 41
    I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won.
    47
  • 42
    I hate you. Maybe not in the "I hope you die" kind of way, rather "I hope you develop an allergy to bacon". And ice cream.
    41
  • 43
    I don't think you are a fool. But then, what's my own humble opinion against thousands of others?
    40
  • 44
    I really wish we were better strangers.
    39
  • 45
    If I had a dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.
    38
  • 46
    If you were my dog, I'd shave your butt and teach you to walk backwards.
    37
  • 47
    Some people deserve to have eggs thrown at them... brick-shaped eggs... made of bricks.
    35
  • 48
    I heard that you were a lady-killer. They take one look at you and die of shock.
    33
  • 49
    Somebody call the zoo! There's been an escape from the simian exhibit.
    27
  • 50
    You: What is the difference between you and an apple?
    Them: I don't know
    You: The apple keeps the doctor away, but you keep everything away!
    6
  • 51
    I'd love to stay and chat, but to be honest I'd rather have type 2 diabetes.
    4
  • 52
    If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
    1
  • 53
    You've never been outspoken; no one has ever been able to.
    -16
  • 54
    You are an oxygen thief.
    -29
  • 55
    I am looking forward to the pleasure of your company, since I haven't had it yet.
    -29
  • 56
    Whatever it is that is eating you, it must be suffering horribly.
    -30
  • 57
    Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?
    -31
  • 58
    My kid knocked up your honor student.
    -31
  • 59
    If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
    -39
  • 60
    You never strike out blindly; you fail in the light.
    -44