Smartass Insults

I Googled "Who Gives a Shit?"
My name wasn't in the results.

Someday you'll go far... and I hope you stay there.

The smartest thing ever to come out of your mouth was a penis.

Hey, unless your name is Google, stop acting like you f*cking know everything.

Stop trying to be a smartass. You're just an ass.

If you were any uglier, neanderthals would have superiority complex.

I’ll try and hide my enthusiasm. How am I doing?

Bully: Turn around and sit your ass down.
Victim: No you do it. Bully: i already am.
Victim: No your ass (point to their face) is right there.

You must be the arithmetic man -- you add trouble, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance.