Random Ugly Insults

Know someone who isn't the prettiest and could do with some banter? Try our insults and comebacks for ugly people.

  • If I got a penny for everyone I've met who is as beautiful as you, I'd have all the money in the world.
    -148
  • I would tell you to go to hell, but all dogs go to heaven.
    98
  • You're so ugly, the doctor put tinted windows on your incubator.
    37
  • What's that shit on your neck? Oh, it's your face!
    88
  • Look, don't go to a mind reader; go to a palmist; I know you've got a palm.
    -22
  • I was going to give you a nasty look, but I see you already have one.
    128
  • You're so ugly when you were born, your mother saw the afterbirth and said "Twins!"
    29
  • How much was that chewbacca costume that your wearing?
    28
  • Whatever is eating you -- must be suffering horribly.
    26
  • She's so ugly she could scare the moss off a rock!
    2
  • If horse-shit was piled up to your height, I'd have trouble telling you apart.
    217
  • You're so ugly, when you walk through a haunted house, you come out with a paycheck.
    135
  • By the way, the zoo called, the baboons want their butts back, so you'll have to find a new face.
    991
  • Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.
    -8
  • I hear you are very kind to animals, so please give that face back to the gorilla.
    125
  • Oh my God, look at you. Anyone else hurt in the accident?!
    47
  • The last time I saw a face like yours I fed it a banana.
    506
  • It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor.
    32
  • Do you accidentally wipe your face after taking a shit?
    82
  • You're so ugly, when michael jackson saw you, he got scared and his skin turn back into black.
    -46