Random Ugly Insults

Know someone who isn't the prettiest and could do with some banter? Try our insults and comebacks for ugly people.

  • If ugly were a crime, you'd get a life sentence.
    86
  • I couldn't help but notice that "awesome" ends with "me", and "ugly" begins with "u".
    236
  • Do you accidentally wipe your face after taking a shit?
    83
  • You're so ugly, the only dates that you get are on a calendar.
    52
  • You've got a set of teeth like a baby piranha.
    -104
  • You're so ugly that when you entered the Ms Ugly competition they said "Sorry, no professionals allowed."
    79
  • Someone took a photo of you once, but it didn't turn out. You could be seen too clearly.
    13
  • If you really want a joke, just look in the mirror.
    261
  • Forget the ugly stick! You must have been born in the ugly forest!
    -52
  • It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor.
    32
  • Did someone beat you with an Ugly Stick..?
    -15
  • You're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mother!
    164
  • Every girl has the right to be ugly, but you abused the privilege!
    606
  • You are so ugly, the last time you got a piece of ass was when your hand slipped through the toilet paper.
    314
  • You look like a visible fart.
    16
  • Folk clap when they see you, but they clap their hands over their eyes.
    12
  • You should have been born in the Dark Ages; you look terrible in the light.
    58
  • I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?
    -12
  • You remind me of my chinese friend; Ugg-lee.
    54
  • I fart to make you smell better.
    436