Random Ugly Insults

Know someone who isn't the prettiest and could do with some banter? Try our insults and comebacks for ugly people.

  • You've got the perfect weapon against muggers - yer face.
  • You're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mother!
  • You're so ugly that you could be yourself for Halloween.
  • She's so ugly she could scare the moss off a rock!
  • Look, don't go to a mind reader; go to a palmist; I know you've got a palm.
  • Your beauty is so rare, no one can find it.
  • You're so ugly, if you stuck your head out the window, they'd arrest you for mooning!
  • You're so ugly, that's why God created paper bags!
  • You've got a set of teeth like a baby piranha.
  • I've hated your looks from the stare they gave me.
  • You are so ugly, the last time you got a piece of ass was when your hand slipped through the toilet paper.
  • You're so ugly, you have a face not even a dog would lick.
  • I may be drunk, but you are ugly, and tomorrow I will be sober.
  • Whatever is eating you -- must be suffering horribly.
  • You're a good example of why some animals eat their young.
  • You've a face like a million dollars - all green and wrinkled.
  • A dope you are and dope will remain. Completely unlike cocaine.
  • You're so ugly, when michael jackson saw you, he got scared and his skin turn back into black.
  • You're so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection ducked.
  • I know one should judge a man by what he really is instead of by appearances, but you are REALLY ugly.