Random Mean Insults

You're so ugly, made Hello Kitty say Good-Bye!

When you die, I'd like to go to your funeral, but I'll probably have to go to work that day. I believe in business before pleasure.

I always wanted to be a trouble-shooter, but now I see you are not worth it!

I'm no cactus expert, but I know a prick when I see one.

How do you get an emo out of a tree? Cut the rope.

You're like a cloud; once you fuck off, it's a beautiful day.

You'd make a lovely corpse!

The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?

You're so pathetic, your imaginary friend hates you.

I hear you are a real humanitarian. You have kept three or four detectives working regularly.

Even your best friend cheats on you and lies to you, and that's the best friend you can get.

You need to go brush your teeth cause all you seem to do is talk shit!

You need to check yourself because what I'm seeing is not reality.

Man alive! But I wish you weren't.

I'm the type of person to laugh at mistakes so sorry if I laugh at your face.

No one should be punished for accident of birth but you look too much like a wreck not to be.

You were the answer to a prayer. Your parents prayed that the world would be made to suffer and here you came along. You're a habit I'd like to kick; with both feet!!

We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.

It cost me five thousand dollars to look up your family history. A thousand to look it up and four thousand to hush it up.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, God made me pretty, What the hell happened to you?