Random Fat Insults

Ready for some funny overweight banter? Comeback with these humorous insults for fat people.

  • Every time he goes on a diet, the farmers revolt.
    -117
  • Your ass is so fat, your asshole is mistaken for the blackhole.
    436
  • You're so fat, when you step on a weighing scale, it says fail.
    -57
  • You're so fat you get clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
    877
  • You're so fat a picture of you would fall off the wall!
    324
  • You're so fat, you literally poop logs.
    -56
  • Behind every fat person there's someone beautiful. No seriously, you're in the way.
    189
  • You're so fat, when you're single it's more like single and ready for a Pringle.
    62
  • You're so fat, if I dropped a bag of Maltesers near you it would be a real life game of hungry hippos!
    65
  • Your so fat that when got on the elevater it said only 15 people at a time maximum thank you
    65
  • Your so fat when you go to theme parks you get a group discount!
    175
  • Some people carry ketchup with them, some people carry maple syrup with them. But you, you carry the whole fucking McDonald's!
    142
  • You're so fat that you bleed chocolate milk.
    86
  • At least when I do a handstand my stomach doesn't hit me in the face.
    1.5K
  • You're so fat, you stock up for hibernation.
    -52
  • When was the last time you saw your whole body in the mirror?
    167
  • If your IQ was as high as your weight, you'd be a genius.
    207
  • You're so fat, when you do push-ups, your stomach hits the floor and leaves marks.
    66
  • You're so fat that you sweat mayonnaise!
    -85
  • You're so fat, when you sit around the house, you sit AROUND the HOUSE.
    -304