Random Fat Insults

Ready for some funny overweight banter? Comeback with these humorous insults for fat people.

  • You're so fat, when God said let their be light, he said get your fat ass out the way.
    225
  • You're so fat, when you take a shower your feet don't get wet!
    170
  • When was the last time you saw your whole body in the mirror?
    165
  • Behind every fat person there's someone beautiful. No seriously, you're in the way.
    185
  • You're so fat that even a picture of you would fall off the wall!
    58
  • You're so fat, you sweat gravy.
    -15
  • You are so fat NASA orbits satellites around you.
    122
  • You're so fat you get clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
    871
  • You wanna know how I know you're an autobot? You have to "roll out" of everywhere you go.
    32
  • Your so fat, that you have to use a mattress as a maxi-pad.
    107
  • When you stepped on the scale I thought my phone number popped up.
    290
  • You're the reason god created double doors!
    140
  • You're so fat, your blood type is Ragu.
    78
  • Hey! If we killed you, we would stop world hunger!
    190
  • Your so fat when you go to theme parks you get a group discount!
    175
  • You're so fat the last time you saw 90210 was on a scale
    318
  • You're so fat, when you step on a weighing scale, it says fail.
    -55
  • Person: Does this dress make me look fat?
    You: No, your fat makes you look fat.
    100
  • You're so fat, you literally poop logs.
    -55
  • You're so fat, if I dropped a bag of Maltesers near you it would be a real life game of hungry hippos!
    66