Random Fat Insults

Ready for some funny overweight banter? Comeback with these humorous insults for fat people.

  • He has bigger tits than his mom
    152
  • Damn - you need a bell hanging from your neck!
    -71
  • You're so fat, I took a picture of you last Christmas and it's still printing.
    232
  • Roses are red, and bananas are yellow yo mama so fat she giggle like jellow.
    539
  • You're so fat, when you get bored of eating donuts, you shove two up your ass for the winter.
    180
  • I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
    280
  • You're so fat if you weighed five more pounds, you could get group insurance!
    28
  • Everyone stop insulting him, he has enough on his plate already.
    123
  • Your ass is so fat, your asshole is mistaken for the blackhole.
    435
  • Behind every fat person there's someone beautiful. No seriously, you're in the way.
    190
  • You're so fat, when you step on a weighing scale, it says fail.
    -57
  • You're so fat, when you get into row boat it becomes a submarine.
    92
  • When you stepped on the scale I thought my phone number popped up.
    295
  • You're so fat, your ass looks like a road map.
    -43
  • Well, I'll see you in my dreams -- if I eat too much.
    -24
  • You're so fat, you leave footprints in concrete.
    454
  • You're so fat, you stock up for hibernation.
    -52
  • You are so fat that I hear you were arrested three times for jay-walking when all the time you were just standing on the corner waiting for the light to change.
    120
  • You're so fat, when God said let their be light, he said get your fat ass out the way.
    227
  • Your so fat, that you have to use a mattress as a maxi-pad.
    107