Random Fat Insults

Ready for some funny overweight banter? Comeback with these humorous insults for fat people.

  • You wanna know how I know you're an autobot? You have to "roll out" of everywhere you go.
    34
  • You're so fat, if I dropped a bag of Maltesers near you it would be a real life game of hungry hippos!
    65
  • Hey, you have something on your chin.... No, the 3rd one down.
    236
  • You're so fat, when you get bored of eating donuts, you shove two up your ass for the winter.
    180
  • You're so fat, when you're single it's more like single and ready for a Pringle.
    62
  • You're so fat you get clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
    878
  • You're so fat, your blood type is Ragu.
    77
  • Your so fat, that you have to use a mattress as a maxi-pad.
    107
  • You're so fat that the only thing stopping you from going to weight watchers is the door.
    143
  • Roses are red, and bananas are yellow yo mama so fat she giggle like jellow.
    534
  • You're so fat, when you do push-ups, your stomach hits the floor and leaves marks.
    67
  • You're so fat if you got your shoes shined, you'd have to take his word for it!
    3
  • You are so fat NASA orbits satellites around you.
    120
  • You're so fat that you bleed chocolate milk.
    86
  • Person: Does this dress make me look fat?
    You: No, your fat makes you look fat.
    104
  • Damn - you need a bell hanging from your neck!
    -71
  • Hey! If we killed you, we would stop world hunger!
    193
  • You're so fat the last time you saw 90210 was on a scale
    320
  • When you stepped on the scale I thought my phone number popped up.
    295
  • I see you were so impressed with your first chin that you added two more.
    1.1K