Random Good Comebacks

In need of a witty comeback? Check out these good comebacks and you'll be ready for any insult that may come your way!

  • Quick, check your face! I just found your nose in my business.
    344
  • You remind me of Moses. Every time you open your mouth, the bull rushes.
    -82
  • Your mouth is getting too big for your muzzle.
    107
  • You're so low, you have to climb up a ladder to reach the bottom.
    219
  • Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to like you?
    165
  • I admire your because I've never had the courage it takes to be a liar, a thief and a cheat.
    -51
  • I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
    631
  • Insult: Have your balls dropped yet?
    You: Yeah, in your mom's mouth!
    160
  • I've had snappier comebacks from a bowl of Rice Crispies.
    154
  • Insult: Why are you so stupid?
    Comeback: Because I'm related to you!
    114
  • The problem with you is that you lack the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
    -465
  • I'm sorry dear, but in order for you to insult me, I must first value your opinion. Nice try though.
    585
  • Person: You are what you eat.
    Comeback: Perhaps that's why you're such a dick.
    405
  • I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
    1.7K
  • No wonder you have such a shitty view of the world with how far your head is stuck up your ass.
    319
  • I hope one day, you choke on the shit you talk.
    535
  • Person: What are you looking at?
    Comeback: Your dad's incorrect use of a condom.
    715
  • Insult: Suck my dick!
    Comeback: Why take the job away from your mother?
    678
  • Insult: Why do you even wear a bra? You don't have anything to put in it.
    Comeback: You wear pants, don't you?
    480
  • You asked for my number and I said 1-800 kiss my ass
    473