Random Casual Insults

If I were a bird, you'd be the first person I'd shit on.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.

I'm sorry, but I couldn't think of a non-insulting way to describe you.

It won't be the same without you. It will be better.

Somebody call animal control! There's a stray bitch running around!

You remind me of a penny; you're two-faced, worthless and CRUSTY AS HELL!

I used to want a pet monkey, but that was before I met you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from you.

If you were my dog, I'd shave your butt and teach you to walk backwards.

Grip your ears firmly, and pull your head out of your ass.

Some people deserve to have eggs thrown at them... brick-shaped eggs... made of bricks.

You're such an anal orifice.

Looks like you have congenital diarrhea. It runs down your 'genes'.

Deja Poo: The feeling that you've heard this crap before.

Nothing brightens up a room like your absence.

Were you born an idiot or have you had to work at it?

If I were a dog and you were a flower I'd lift my leg up and give you a shower.

You've never been outspoken; no one has ever been able to.

I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won.

I don't think you are a fool. But then, what's my own humble opinion against thousands of others?